Lightning strike !!

Hmm did you know that almost all if not majority of the Lightning Strike victims in Malaysia are Male ???

Hmm ? hmm? Why leh ?

Today it's a Sunday and i normally sleep until 10 am or so, or just wake up naturally regardless what time it is. However i was having this weard dream that I was sitting at a corner of KLIA or some air port while all the air craft is landing one after another. Siao eh crazy dream. So i woke up and , heh ? How come the KLIA noise is still around in my head one ? I opened the windows and looked outside, hmm, funny, i stay in PJ and it's 60km away from KLIA right? But how come ..... and then the noise came again. It was some noisy slow helicopter flying low over our PJ sky actually. Well, i said to myself, what are they doing here ? ( and i suddenly remember that they are doing some practise for the coming don't know what celebration. ) and i told myself, practise then practise lah, why must you all practise over PJ and making noise and giving me nightmare and waking me up before 9 am on a wonderful Sunday morning? That's wrong attitude dude ! So when you have wrong attitude I must do something to correct your attitude !! I was searching for the sign of the air craft and then i saw it ! Mother farker ! Damn noisy formation of helicopter squadran appeared infront of my windows again !!

This big ass helicopter is the nosiest ! But 1 helicopter normally wouldn't produce so much of noise, isn't it ? Tak kan ada whole squadran of helicopter early morning right? I was so wrong !!

Ah ... good God there were 7 of them all rotating around my condo making noise and burning fuel !! I am very Beh Song liao, what could I do to make myself feeling Songer leh? Think Jack Think !!

I became a little bit annoyed with noise on a nice Sunday morning, so I went to my F-117 and took out the Stinger ( USD 4,000 ) per pop and aimed at the helicopters formation. Target locked with radar and laser, and infra-red tracing also activated. What am I waiting for? Lock and load and shot ! I gently squizzed the trigger and the missile was launched.

Missile flying towards the formation. T minus 4 seconds before impact, I promptly closed my ears, going to be loud that that distance.

4 seconds later, the anti air missile hit the target head on and the target bursted into a big fireball. That's direct hit ! Positive impact PI PI.... Yee Haw !! I am good !! Now I could enjoy a peaceful Sunday morning liao, and what happened to the rest of helicopter ? Some landed and some disappeared in the cloud. There was one landed infront of my condo, it's a Black Hawk down !! Black Hakw down !!

Mayday Mayday !! Black Hawk Down !! Black Hawk Down !!

来 嘢 咗 and 一 言 惊 醒 梦 中 人 !!!

Was talking to Jason over the MSN just now
and expressed to him that i might wanted to let go of my
Panasonic FZ30 which i have just bought 5 months ago.

Reason? There was this son of a bitch Jeff who sells camera at
Time Square spoken to me. He said FZ30 is for pro-sumer and I
am going to advance level liao, need at least a dSLR baru ok !

Then he turned around and showed me the Olympus E-330 which
comes with 2 lenses and everything is RM 3,600.00.

He said:" 底到烂！"

I said:" No ! 底裤都烂 baru betul ! RM3,600 !! Cis !! "

He then proceed and start taking photos using this E-330 and showed
me the photos . OMG !!

I gulped and asked again, " How much already ?"

Jeff :" RM3,600 only, very the 底 !"

I said to Jeff with tears in my eyes," No Jeff, I ain't have no money !"

Jeff:" Never mind, you could sell your FX30 for RM2,000 and etc !"

Me, run away like a women who found that her husband is having an
affair with another man ( wtf? yeah Brokeback thing , you know ? )
on their bed.

Jeff:" Woi Woi Woi ! I reserve one unit for you ok? you go and find
RM3,600 in 2 months time. "

Jeff is really an arse hole ! arse hole ! arse hole !!!!!!!

Actually Jeff has warned me before, a few months ago....

Jeff :" Oh you better don't touch dSLR ok ? "

Me:" Why ? You think i am not rich enough to buy ah ? "

Jeff looked me up and down, twice and said :" Yeah, you are not rich!"

Me:" Ha ha ha ha ! Don't worry lah, i will not kena hooked one ! "

Jeff:" 听着先 lah ! "

and now here I am, everynight thinking of the new E-330 and
want to die like that.

Really 欲仙欲死 now leh thinking of E-330.

Then my rescue team arrived, Jason said:" Oi ! Farker listen up ! "

Me with tears in my eyes," Why? What ? Where is my E-330 ?"

Jason," Why you want to change FZ30 to E-330 ? hmmm ?"

Me:" Cause i kena hooked liao ! Lai Yeh Zho 来嘢咗 !"

Jason:" Listen to me carefully, I thougt you said you wanted to
get married and things like that ? "

Me :" Holy Cow ! 一言惊醒梦中人 !!!!! "

I better start saving money instead of spending them like there
is no tomorrow like that.

2 worst thing that could happen to a person, ever !!

1, is that you are dying in 2 hours, but you still have 20 million USD !!
2, is that you finished using all the 20 million USD but you still not dead!!

So, that's how a 22 years old boy scout from MMU who saved the
team leader of Las Vagas Crime Scene Investigaton Team.

Mr. Gil Grissom is very thankful to Mr. Jason from MMU, Melacca.

And talking about getting married is another story, let's avoid talking
about it, banyak tensi

Quote of the day.

Me:" A leaked rubber could cost life and dead sometimes!"

Friend:" Is that so ? "

Me:" If the paramedic wears a broken / leaked rubber gloves and attended to contamination, he/she could get his/herself in danger, even death ? right ?"

Fried:" You are right !"

MeL" If a leaked or peciah condom is used, she could get a new life or two right ? "

Friend:" Iyeeerr ! you humsup !! "

Me -_-" what ? It's true isn't it ? That's really the matter of life and death !

Friend:" Iyerrrr you very humsup !! "

流金歲月的點滴

There are times when I am having an afternoon nap on a nice Saturday (or Sunday) when someone has call up and disturb my meeting with Ms Vivian Chow Wai Muna/p Dato' Chow. And I always feel like -_-" oiyo process tidur terdendala pula !!

Well, today it's a diffrent story, as I have mentioned that my F-117 has turned into something like Super Aquarium capable bay. Thanks Proton ! Thanks a lot !!

To make the damp smell disappear, i have asked the security guard at my condo to give me a visitor space which is under open air section to expose my car to maximum sunshine to dry the aquarium up.

And i proceed back to my room and as usual the Standard of Procedure S.O.P. for Saturday afternoon would be :

Close windows, curtain shut.

Turn on air cond.

System shut down and zzzzzzzzz.....

About 2 hours later a friend of mine Ah B called me and wanted to check some information with me. And she asked:" Am I disturbing your S.O.P for Saturday?"

I said:" Yeah you just did ! "

She:" Sorry ah ! " and started her story....

I looked out to windows and shouted:" Oh fart ! "

She:" Hmmm? You just farted ?"

Me:" No no, I have to thank you for waking me up cause now it is going to rain and i have to move my F-117 the convertable Super Aquarium into my car park to avoid it being damaged by rain. "

She:" Oh ok, so you owe me a lunch for waking you up?"

Me:" ok ok can whatever also can ! gtg bye!"

She:" Ok, so you don't hate me for waking you up from your afternoon nap ?"

Me:" Not at all, thanks for saving my F-117 from being damaged , muaks ! "

She:" Iyerrr !! "

Me:" LOL ok bye !"

She:" Bye !!"

Well, there you go, it depends what is the timing when you call me and wake me up, for this case, i am really glad that she have called, else.... yeah ?

This Blog is specially dedicated to those who have disturbed my afternoon nap, thank you very much you all!

My sister and Harry Porter.

My sister was staying at my place for the past few weeks
cause she has to attend her practical at some court in PJ.

One fine morning she asked me, " Hei koko, did you realize that some of your neighbours have owls as their pets ? "

Me:" Nolah, in condo we can't raise or keep any pets"

My sister:" But morning i heard gru gru gru gru sound!"

Me -_-"

Me:" That is the sound of Pigeon lah ! "

My sister -_-" :" really meh ?"

Me :" Yeahlah, the sound of owl is like uhh uhh uhh and not gruu gruu gruu gruu... uhh uhh uh ?? "

My sister:" hmm hmm hmmm , ba ba ba ?? "

Me :" Boo Boo Doh ! "

My sister :" He He He !!! "

What is going on with the kids nowadays? She is having her Law Degree in less then 1 year time leh but she can't diffrenciate the sound of Pigeon and Owl.

And my sister:" Oh like that is it? I thought you know the Harry Porters people and all stays next to to your condo unit mar !! "

I 2 legs in the sky !!

DIY or DIM

So after I found out that the problem with F-117's cargo bay. Today I guess it is going to be a busy day for me -_-"

I have to go and purchase some stuff and DIY DIM ( Do it myself ).

Anti rust compound (rubber gum like stuff).

Solvent.

Small brush.

Protective equipment.

La la la la !!! My Saturday has become something like CSI day. I have to get the full gear above and start processing the evidence.

It's like Gil Grissom working on Saturday, Hooray !!

And Thanks a lot to Proton, i love you very much for giving me such an opportunity to buy these gears, learn how to use them, stand under hot sun for 2 - 3 hours, and etc. This is what we call Value Added , right ?

CSI Theme Song playes. Who Are you ? Who Who ?? Who Who ??

F-117 is not an air craft, she is a ship.

This morning while checking the cargo sector of F-117 there
was some damp smell. I check and announced that :

"Errr... Houston, we have problem ! " in radio ....

Upon checking I found out that the cargo sector is having a leak at an unknown spot ( ain't that bitch? ) and water was leaking in for the past 1 or 2 days.

There were heavy rain and storm and shit like that for the past few days in PJ and Subang area, in fact the whole Klang valley.

My car actually started to have this problem since 2002 when I first bought it, not only mine but my uncle Addy Ho also had the same problem.

But my father Choo Yeng fixed the problem with some anti-rust compound and my cargo area was sealed air-tight until it was hit by some AAM a few weeks ago !!! mcbknn!!

My previous company car an Iswara also had the leaking problem. Whenever it rains and when it rains hard, water leaks from the rubber area and come in like Niagra Fall and well the water stopped at the spare tyre bay, foaming an good Aquarium.

So that's what we call, Buy car and get free Aquarium .

You could raise Gold Fish, Flower Horn , Tortoise etc in the free Aquarium. How thoughtful of the Malaysian car manufacturer eh ? That's why I love them !!

Now since when that Proton has started venture into shipping and logistic business ? No ?

Are you sure? If not, then why does the customer of Proton have to send their vehicle to shipping yard and get the leakage patched?

In my place Kelantan, only ships, sampan, boats and sea/ river transport need and require patches to fix the leakage, but my Proton woh? Why does it need patching for leh ?

And those ships, sampan, boats and sea/ river transport only require patches after a few years, not brand new.

I am confused, what is going on here leh ? confused....

My dream job.

钱多事少离家近
睡觉睡到自然醒

每天上班等放班

每天一到六点唱：

无惊无险
又到六点！

欢乐时光过得快
又是时间讲拜拜

LaLaLaLaLa !!

LaLaLaLaLa !!

LOL

Selena the Dog Lover.

A few days ago we went to Fane's new house and tried to clean the backyards which was full of grass and stuff like that.

Prince (Putera) the Golden Retriever saw we opened the backdoor of the new house it he shouted at us:" Woh ! Backdoor Orifice! " and I was wondering WTF how come a Dog also knows so much about IT nowadays ???

And in 3 seconds Prince ran out to the backyard which was full of grass and some woods left by the previous people who stayed in this house before.

And Selena and my sister saw Prince shilvered a few seconds and then it that Son of a bitch started to poo all over the backyard !!!!

Selena and my sister almost fainted when they saw Prince produced about 2kg of Gold on the floor that they were about to clean and ....... OMFG !!

Selena who claimed herself who loves dogs so much also cannot stand the 2kg of Gold on the floor and almost ran to toilet and puke.

I said to Selena:" Oi, I thought you love dogs ?"

She (face green green ):" Yes, I love dogs !"

Me:" Then ? Why see Poo then want to puke ?"

She (face become white ):" I don't like the poo, especially the smell of the poo !! Owekkkk !!! "

Me:" Apalah you ! Sikit-sikit pun mahu muntah !! "

I showed her how we Hero ( who loves and repects dogs ) clean the dog poo.

I picked up a piece of wood and wanted to use it as a shovel or scoop to scoop the one of the biggest poos ( there were 3 pieces of poo , damn Prince, what did you eat ? )into the drain but....

the poo disintegrated into smaller pieces of poos and some flakes.

All of us were -_-" , Selena:" eeeweeeekkk !!! "

Me:" Ok, your turn ! " and ran away quick quick.

Selena + My sister looked at me and said:" Niabeh!"

Selena (with dog poos experiance) ordered my sister to bring the water hose and used the water to flushed everything into the drain. And everything done !! as simple as that .

Me:" Good job Selena, good job ! "

Selena:" Hmmmppphhfffff !! I look you no up ! "

Me -_-" ok ok, the best way to clean dog poos is to use water if one is near to drain or something like that.

But from this incident, I have learned something.

It's NOT a Golden Retriever dog, it's the 2kg one pop Gold Producer.

Prince did not say " Woh ! Backdoor Orifice! " but he said " Woh ! Back door for Pang Sai! "

Damn ! Selena doesn't like Poo smell.

Dog poos get disintegrated easily.

This dog needs more fibre cause the poo was too, hmmm, too easily get disintegrated.

Dog poos smells stronger when it get disintegrated.

Water cleans poos.

Shover or scoops disintegrates poos.

Dogs normally is not good at IT.

Dogs don't know

And oh yeah, the drain is underground drain and I suppose it leads the poo to Indah Water place. LOL !!

How silly " Woh ! Back door for Pang Sai! " tersalah dengar jadi " Woh ! Backdoor Orifice! " pula. bodoh betul -_-"

This morning at about 1 am the glass of my windows were sort of vibrating violently, and i looked out and felt that it is going to rain cause there were thick clouds and strong winds. Yahoo i told myself, please expect a cold morning and fresh air awaiting you at 4 or 5 am. I said to myself, " Let it rain , let it rain and let it rain please ? " Sometimes the glass vibrating could be scary as if it is going to break any time, but it always rain after the strong winds. Let it rain !

I knew something was wrong when the wind kept on blowing while there was no sign of raining at all. It could only means one thing, these clouds are going to be blown to somewhere else and we ain't going to get any rain this morning mate ! Sorry, better luck next time perhaps. The clouds are getting thinner and lesser like the hair of my neighbour Uncle Gont, the clouds are also like the cash bill in my wallet, getting lesser and lesser every minutes. Stop that will you ?

The wind kept on blowing away the clouds over PJ sky towards Kepong and KL area. Blow by blow and the clouds are getting less and less over PJ sky. No dammit don't go!! I need you to rain here in PJ !

The clouds are all gone finally at 1:34am. Bringing my hopes of heavy rain and cold morning together with them. Literally "Gone with the wind!"